Life On A B-I7

The Letter Part Deux

In my Journal Entry titled “The Letter” on November 13th, I provided a translation of the thoughts of a young man I ran into. He graciously gave me a letter he had proudly composed. It was a confusing composition because the man is developmentally disabled. Despite that handicap, he wrote a stirring piece that was obviously intended to relieve his own burden while at the same time changing the minds of those fortunate enough to read his words.

The translation was provided by Grammarly’s AI copy-editing feature. The AI engine did a good job of taking a difficult-to-read piece of writing and turning it into a coherent work. While this demonstrates the power of AI, it does not reflect my own interpretation, which I humbly present below:

There are many people in the world who have been mistreated, even hated. One could not blame them if after having repeatedly endured this abuse, they begin to feel hatred toward their abusers. This pattern has to be broken for the world to become a safer place for all of us to live. When others feel pain because of our actions, we are moving in the wrong direction. Turning the table, and sharing pain back is not the answer, even if it is understandable on a primal level. We should be, we are, more evolved than that. The answer has to be, to find a way to show empathy and compassion to those who are suffering in some way. Even those whom we may find ourselves disagreeing with deserve this effort from us. With practice and patience, we can get better at sowing compassion, as individuals, and as a society. It begins with compassion, that is the bridge that fords the river of hate and allows us to reach the other side, the side where we allow ourselves to show love. Love freely given permits those who see themselves as victims to begin to look differently at themselves, and at everyone around them. This will make all of us better humans.

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The Letter

“Having compassion, toward another, is Love, whenever they feel there is no Love, at all. Due to whatever they suffer. While there is so much hate, in the world, today. And the only way to abolish hate, is to have mercy, upon the hated to the point, where no one see’s any reason to hate, others around them, at all. For, after so many, have been hurt by those who had been mistreated, by others, around them all. It will be the right choice to not pass judgement against any of them, at all, so they will not see any point, in rising up in their own anger, with hate, against anyone, at all. So they too, will see no reason to be aggressive with harm, toward everyone, of many, out of the number all. So that lives, will have time to mend, with healing, as every weapon, of hate is beaten down, into plowshares, for the sake of peace, between all. Beginning with that same compassion, of Love, that begins from the heart, of kindness, shown unto everyone, of all. Between those, of whoever learned to have patients for those, of the hated to have a change of heart, apart from having any thoughts, of aggressive harm toward them and or anyone else around, at all, so that enough light, will be able to shine, on the realization that if hate, is replaced by Love. There will only be merciful compassion that stands in the place, of all hatred within the thoughts, of everyone, of all, and all around them all.”

I was given this letter by a nice young man who is developmentally disabled. We met in a tasting room in Redmond, Oregon. He stopped in to give a copy of the letter to the woman working the taps, they were acquaintances. I asked him if he liked to write and he told me that he did. After a pause, he asked me if I would like a copy of his letter, I said that I would like to read what he had written. He handed me the letter and thanked me. Before he left I was able to read the first little bit, I told him it was very good. That pleased him very much.

Although difficult to parse, I believe he is spot on and I admire him for having the courage to put his thoughts into words and to share them with a stranger. What follows is an interpretation provided by Grammarly’s AI copy-editing feature.

“Compassion towards others is an act of love, especially when they feel unloved due to their suffering. In a world filled with hate, the only way to eliminate it is to show mercy to those who are hated to the point where they no longer see a reason to hate those around them. We should refrain from judging those who have been mistreated by others, as this may lead to their own anger and aggressive behavior towards others. Let us show kindness and patience towards those who are hated so that they may have a change of heart and see the light of love, which is more powerful than hate. By replacing hate with love, we can eliminate all hatred and promote compassion towards everyone. So let us start with ourselves and show kindness to all, especially those who need it most, and let mercy and compassion be the guiding force in our thoughts and actions.”

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def

I dreamed last night that I was learning a new computer language. Somehow I got my hands on the solution to the final exam. I remember looking over the answer and noticing with surprise that I was supposed to use a function. (A function allows you to define a set of steps to be performed, and once stored, reuse them whenever needed.)

I’m not sure where I’m going with this, or why the dream seemed like such a revelation. I’ve spent more than 30 years of my waking hours working with this, and similar concepts. I think my subconscious was trying to tell me something…

My best guess is that I need to do a better job of saving memories for later recall, the equivalent of saving a function for reuse. Recently my daughter and I were reminiscing about her graduation and she reminded me about a day trip that we made together with her sisters. I did not recall the event. I have a feeling that’s because I did not do a good enough job “storing” the memory so it could be “retrieved.” later. It is painful to admit this, but the reason could be that I am a bit too self-absorbed to do a proper job of saving memories of events where I haven’t been the primary instigator or beneficiary. I’m going to work on this.

In the Python language, “def” is the keyword used to “define” a function, Typically a function will “return” a value of some sort, but the use of a return value is optional. When I encode memories I need to be sure and include a return value…

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Powder

Skiing down a slope in two feet of fresh powder snow… Unless you live on the mountain, it rarely happens, but when it does, you must relax and start by giving thanks for being there, in that moment. When you are ready, you let your mind go and you give your body permission to feel the mountain. On a good day, when you reach the bottom of the slope you look up and you see the evidence of what the mountain has given you. Those are not your tracks, they are the tell-tale of what the mountain has graciously allowed you to experience this day.

If you give the Grammarly AI assistant the chance to rewrite the paragraph above, this is the result:

Skiing down a slope covered in two feet of fresh powder snow is a rare and exhilarating experience. In that moment, take a deep breath and give thanks for being there. Then, let your mind go and allow your body to feel the mountain. When you reach the bottom of the slope on a good day, look up and appreciate the evidence of what the mountain has given you. The tracks in the snow are not yours; they are the tell-tale sign of what the mountain has graciously allowed you to experience.

I like mine better, including the run-on sentence.

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iPhone

My iPhone screens are a masterclass in organization. Why? Because I want to spend absolutely as little tines as possible looking at them. According to Bill Maher, phones make you “shady, needy, mean, selfish and passive-aggressive.” Even if he’s wrong, there’s no need to push my luck…

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Demagogue

This is a personal website which tries its best to present material that originates directly from my personal experience. In other words, I listen to the voice in my head and try not to be too influenced by the speech floating around me. I’m more interested in what I think than I am in what other people tell me I should be thinking.

An added distinction is in order before we get to the topic of this post. People that have taken the time to write down their thoughts and the reasoning for those, do hold sway with me. Our founding fathers are example of those sorts of people. Using those thoughts as background for the formation of our own opinions is a valid approach to opinion forming.

Although I have a degree in Political Science and I enjoy the study of history even at this later stage in life, that does not give me the right to tell you what to think… However, I think it allows me to share with you what I have learned, you can form your own opinion about what this means, as have I.

Taking a look back at the writings of our founding fathers, George Washington and Alexander Hamilton in particular, there are lessons to be gleaned that are applicable today. George Washington’s greatest fear was that a cult of personality would be used to subvert democracy. He expressed this view in letters he wrote during the summer of 1787 when he was attending the Constitutional Convention in Philadelphia. He even stated that his primary reason for attending was to prevent such an occurrence in a still very young and forming country.

In Washington’s day, the word demagogue was not commonly used as an insult or in a derogatory way. When it was used, it was not as easily dismissed as it is today. This is largely I believe because today so few people really understand what it means. The meaning of the word has been known since Greek and Roman times. It was as clear to Washington in his day as it is to historical scholars today, the meaning is precise. A demagogue is someone who uses distrust, fear, threats, emotional appeals to prejudice, and yes, even lies to obtain power. Almost always the power sought is personal power. I’m not aware of any incident in history when demagoguery was used to obtain power so that altruistic goals could then be pursued.

In the Federalist Papers No. 1, Alexander Hamilton writes:

“History will teach us that… of those men who have overturned the liberties of republics, the greatest number have begun their career by paying an obsequious court to the people; commencing demagogues, and ending tyrants.”

It is clear what Washington and Hamilton thought about demagogues and what the result of the words and actions of demagogues will lead to. The take-away is to avoid allowing our emotions to lead our decision making. Relying on the wisdom and the experience of others, and what history teaches us, is a much more reliable guide.

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I Write

I write every day.
Often I don’t have much to say… and I rarely rhyme.

The point is to step outside of myself
for a brief period of time.

Material on this site is presented in chronological order. To view content by subject use the Archive link above.

The Future

The sun is shining through the window, casting a shadow on the page as I write. I see the movement of the pen across the page. When I set the tip of the pen to paper, the shadow joins the ink, the two work together to lay down words onto the page. I have only a vague idea what the words about to come out may be… Like life itself, we cannot look into the future and say “this or that will happen.” It’s best to look into the future and simply say, what comes to me tomorrow will be the fruit of the seeds that I plant today.

Writing as Meditation

I try to write every day. I find that writing can be a form of meditation when there is no preconceived idea of what should be placed on the paper. (My writing usually goes into a hand-written journal before it appears here, if it appears here…) This morning the following words appeared on the page and seemed worthwhile.

I think my cat has helped me. We need an animal spirit to teach us how to live — or at a minimum, to point out to us where we need to focus. My cat is the picture of contentment, gratefulness, and play. As I should be. Sometimes when I most want him close to me he declines to share the moment. That’s not bad. I have to respect that his needs don’t always align with mine. When that happens, it is a message to be patient and wait for the proper moment to reach out. It takes two. One alone is not how it works. The only time one alone need not worry about someone else is when there is no someone else. As long as someone else chooses to be a part of our life, to join with us on this journey, however they choose to do that, respect and patience must rule our thoughts, emotions and most importantly, our behavior.

Seeds

”Many think that seeds improve with age. I have no doubt that time discriminates between the good and the bad; and when at last I shall plant, I shall be less likely to be disappointed.”

Henry David Thoreau

I guess it’s obvious now that I’m reading “Walden”. I run into a passage now and then that strikes me. I’m not sure you can read Walden and not be struck dumb at times… He may be talking about seeds and planting in this passage, but I prefer to think the idea runs deeper. He seems to be telling me that I shouldn’t be quick to form judgements or even make decisions, but rather the opposite. The best decisions are those that are considered carefully. I can think of many examples in my life when I have not followed Thoreau’s advice. Perhaps I should have read “Walden” with a critical eye much earlier in life, but then again, I have to admit that it is better to stumble late to this advice than never.

Rich

”…for a man is rich in proportion to the number of things which he can afford to let alone.”

Henry David Thoreau

It pains me to think that I can elaborate on this thought. At the risk of trying to place myself in the same company as Thoreau, a vain thought, not one that I would entertain for a second, let me say that what we live without is more defining than what we live with. This knowledge comes from age and experience, but it doesn’t hurt to have someone as wise and eloquent as Thoreau to occasionally remind us.

Proper Punctuation

I’ve been reading “The Elements Of Style” by William Strunk Jr. and E. B. White. It is a fascinating book that attempts to teach people how to be better writers. This may be a cause lost on me but I find it worth the effort regardless. I discovered this morning that all of the titles to my journal entries have been improperly punctuated. Complete dates, like the one used in the title of this post, contain parenthetical clauses (as does this sentence). The separate parts of the date should be delineated with commas, like so:

Saturday, September 9, 2023 not Saturday September 9 2023, as I have been doing my entire life.

I find it utterly useless to acquire this knowledge this late in life, but also utterly charming.

You have probably noted that I created a sentence above that contains two parenthetical clauses, one separated by commas and the other delineated using parenthesis. I have no clue what William Strunk would have to say about that, but I suspect he would find it appalling.

My Cat

I saw a fellow walking along the road, not far back a truck was parked. The truck was set-up for overlanding. I figured what the heck. I stopped to see if the fellow needed a ride, he did. I asked if that was his truck I had just passed and he confirmed that it was. I told him to hop-in and I’d give him a ride wherever he was going. I also said, “as long as you don’t mind riding with a cat.” He laughed and said “that’s a little weird, usually it’s a dog, but that’s cool.”

I can’t find it in myself to trade-in my cat for a dog, so the cat is just going to have to live with me. I’m pretty sure I like him, and I’m pretty sure he likes me… Although with cats it can be hard to tell…

Moral Code

I chose the title “Moral Code” for want of anything better, that seems to be what this list is all about. These have become known as Hutchins’ Laws, first widely published in 1947. Hutchins was Chancellor of the University of Chicago from 1929 to 1951. Trained in Philosophy, this appears to be something of a manifesto of his moral code.

• The Good American tries to stay in good health
• The Good American controls his/her emotions
• The Good American Is self-reliant
• The Good American is reliable
• The Good American plays fair
• The Good American does his/her duty
• The Good American tries to do the right thing
• The Good American tries to do the right thing in the right way
• The Good American works with friendly cooperation
• The Good American is kind
• The Good American is loyal

These look to me a lot like slogans. Like the infamous “Make America Great Again.” That phrase was first used by Ronald Reagan, then appropriated by Donald Trump. Regardless of that little bit of history, these slogans have power that can be weirdly for both positive and negative purposes. Beware of the person that insists some moral code has been lost and must be reestablished. When that happens you are probably listening to someone that is attempting to control you.

You cannot go back to the past, whatever that is. What you can do is learn from it, hopefully not repeat events that were detrimental while finding a way to create events that are beneficial. This is not always a clear process.

The first thing I did when examining this list was to take the word “American” out of these phrases and substitute the word “person.” That removes at least one bias. It also seems to me you have a man that is taking his inspiration from the Bible. Be that as it may (I have no idea if that is the case here) these are all good ideals to strive for, in any time, and any country. Don’t be blinded. These words can be used for good purposes as well as not good purposes, it depends on the person wielding them.

Personally, I like this list, I even try and do most of these things. But if I were to tell you that you should live by these rules I would be stepping into a place where I am assuming too much authority over you.

A Watershed Moment

We are living in a watershed moment in American History. We face a Constitutional crisis no less crucial or important than the events leading up to the Civil War in 1860.

George Washington in his farewell address in 1796 laid out the grounds of citizenship clearly and unequivocally:

”The basis of our political systems is the right of the people to make and to alter their Constitutions of Government. But the Constitution which at any time exists, till changed by an explicit and authentic act of the whole people, is sacredly obligatory upon all. The very idea of the power and the right of the people to establish Government presupposes the duty of every individual to obey the established Government.”

“All obstructions to the execution of the Laws, all combinations and associations, under whatever plausible character, with the real design to direct, control, counteract, or awe the regular deliberation and action of the constituted authorities, are destructive of this fundamental principle, and of fatal tendency …”

“However combinations or associations of the above description may now and then answer popular ends, they are likely, in the course of time and things, to become potent engines, by which cunning, ambitious, and unprincipled men will be enabled to subvert the power of the people, and to usurp for themselves the reins of government; destroying afterwards the very engines which have lifted them to unjust dominion.”

Simply put, we as citizens are obligated by our adoption of the Constitution to recognize and check any person or persons involved in acts that are designed to circumvent or betray the Constitution. Failure to do so is failure to support the principle which we consider to be fundamental to our lives and livelihood, Democracy.

Speech

Never trust a man who speaks ill of another, it’s likely ulterior motives are in play. If someone’s speech makes you angry, rest assured that is the intent, for by this path the one that seeks to anger you also seeks to control you.

Modesty

It is a rhetorical rule of thumb that every good speech or piece of writing should begin with an expression of modesty.

That is my new defense. I’ve been told that I make a habit of following that rule a bit too enthusiastically. Let me just say:

I’m not an expert in these things,

but I disagree…

…I think modesty is a virtue, what I have failed to mention is that this rule was the norm in the mid-ninteenth century. I’m not 169 years old, I just sound like it.

Tuesday May 2, 2023 (Journal Entry)

In Japan your doctor can give you a prescription for a walk in the woods…

How does one stay healthy (besides walking in the woods, which by the way, is not an insignificant part of the equation…) Good physical health and good mental health, including the preservation of memory, are things we have a good bit of personal control over. To do that, there are five areas that we should focus on. These are explained in detail in Sanjay Gupta’s book “Keep Sharp.” I’m no doctor, but I’m pretty sure most doctors would agree with these things without hesitation, In fact, Gupta’s book was recently recommended to me (doctor’s orders) and I’m very grateful for that.

Exercise

Physical exercise. Be active. Whatever it takes to keep moving the body.

Rest

Good sleep and stress reduction. I have started to discover meditation and I think it is going to be transformative.

Nutrition

Eat smart, all things in moderation. Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate.

Learning

Learn something new each day. Write it down, talk about it, use as many senses as you can.

Connection

Spend time socializing and connecting with people.

By the way, I’m not personally convinced that being active on Instagram and Facebook is what is really meant by connecting with people. I still have Instagram and Facebook accounts, but I no longer spend time on those apps. I’m not aware of any studies that have shown them to be healthy activities, I suspect they are anything but that in reality. Connecting with people means connecting fact-to-face, not Facebook-to-Facebook… For the record, I don’t maintain this website because it makes me feel like I am connecting with people, I maintain this website because I love to write, doing so brings me joy, and the act of writing here reinforces the learning and experiences I am gaining in my everyday life.

Thursday April 27, 2023 (Journal Entry)

”And into the forest I go, to lose my mind and find my soul.”

-JOHN MUIR

And onto the road I go, to lose my mind and find my soul.

-ME

To lose my mind… My expectation is that the loss of my mind will make room for new insights and discoveries. Hopefully the mind I leave behind will be waiting for me at the end of the road…

Thursday April 27, 2023 (Journal Entry)

My children are concerned about my memory (at least a portion of it). I don’t discount this. It could very well be. However, all the tests so far have been unremarkable and the Neurologist is unable to make any diagnosis. It could be that I am just a very internal person and external events don’t make all that much of an impression on me. After a lifetime of looking inwards, it might be hard to formulate impressions/memories from external events. Who knows. At any rate, the Neurologist gave me a clean bill of health (in-so-far as she was able). I thought this particular comment from her was worth sharing (because I find it flattering)…

“He is embarking on a solo cycle across the country, averaging 60 miles/day. He manages all IADL/ADLs. He is extremely well organized.”

Well shit. If you are “extremely well organized” you don’t need a memory!

Thursday April 27, 2023 (Journal Entry)

I could not have said it better myself, although, in a way, I am sort of saying it…

I’m starting to get very excited about the journey. Of course there are a lot of open questions that won’t get answered until I am on the road. I’m hopeful all of those questions will be answered in the affirmative, in which case the photo is an accurate description of my upcoming adventure.

Wednesday April 27, 2023 (Journal Entry)

My favorite place. Peloton Bike Shop and Cafe in Seattle. They make good Manhattans too…

Wednesday April 26, 2023 (Journal Entry)

The biggest lie of all time:

If one group gets something, it has to be at the expense of another. To put it another way (for a bit more clarity) if you were to help a group different than your own, it would come at a cost to your group.

Wednesday April 26, 2023 (Journal Entry)

I have been doing daily affirmations. Written in my journal. I’ve been doing it for a while and I’m starting to like it. I’m not sure if it is sinking in or not, I think it is. I can tell it is going to take a long time before I truly believe it, maybe the rest of my life. That’s ok, it doesn’t hurt me to write them every morning…

The first affirmation is:

I am a badass. I love myself. I have enough love for everyone.

This one makes me feel good. I am a badass in a lot of ways. I can ride my bicycle across the country and I can out ski most ski instructors that are my age. That’s pretty good I’d say. Having enough love for everyone is a bit trickier. When a truck driver pulls into my lane on the freeway and the rear of his trailer almost hits the front of my Tacoma, it’s a bit difficult to have love for him. This happened recently and I recall passing him and letting him know my displeasure with my horn. Probably not a “loving” thing to do I suppose.

The second affirmation is:

I can do anything. I will allow the Universe to heal me.

This one is a bit more abstract. I realize I can’t do anything, that is a bit naive. I suppose the idea here is it doesn’t hurt to try. I will allow the universe to heal me is a little vague. When I first started writing that, I literally meant heal me. (I was experiencing back pain at the time.) On reflection, I know the Universe probably is not going to intervene in managing my pain level, not that the Universe doesn’t care, it’s just that the Universe probably doesn’t have time for that. I think what I really mean by that is I will listen more closely to the Universe… So I have modified the second affirmation slightly, I now write:

I can do anything. I will allow the Universe to heal me and guide me.

Sunday April 23, 2023 (Journal Entry)

When my partner woke up this morning I looked at her and said, “I don’t know where they are either…” She laughed and said “that was quite a dream…”

Apparently we were flying, I was at the controls and things weren’t going so well. We almost hit a building and were brushed by another airplane. I told her that I must not be a very good pilot. Her reply was a bit surprising, she said I was doing fine. That doesn’t explain why she was trying to reach for the controls, but dreams are funny, so there’s no real point in trying to dissect this any further. I’m just grateful she thinks my flying wasn’t to blame for the two near catastrophes that caused her to want control of our airplane…